My ICMC Mediation Story #2

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I must start by thanking God for giving me the grace and opportunity to attend the training and impacting in me more spiritual knowledge and blessing.

I am a married woman and a lawyer of 5-6 years post call active practice. My spouse and I have passed the excitement stage and we are now at the second stage of our marriage. The training I received from the ICMC has broadened my general knowledge on management of human beings. Before the training, there was a persisting unsettled issue between my spouse and I. I was more blinded as I had always been with my own interest, concern, and need without paying equal attention to my spouse’s need. However, after the training I had on principles of negotiation, mediation and particularly the onion model as a tool for conflict analysis (to mention but a few) I discovered that the core or vital element which cuts across all the ADR Mechanisms is the interest, need, concern and fear of both parties. Parties’ interest or need may differ or be alike but once both parties are able to discover what they are, it creates understanding and aids in faster settlement of dispute between parties. This has particularly helped me to be more accommodating and concerned of the need, and interest of my spouse and other people around me.

Secondly with the training on personality type, it has helped me to understand who I am, why I act the way I do and to accept myself, so also with my spouse and others around me. More so, I now understand that certain actions exhibited by we humans are connected to a particular personality type hence I no longer despise one’s behavior or action. This has helped me to move or advance to the final stage of marriage which is the acceptance stage.

Finally, as I was taught by our Anchor facilitator, I now make conscious effort to correct and put into practice the avoidance of the use of the statement “You are wrong” rather to say “You are correct from your own perspective.”

Thank You and remain blessed.

Participant, ICMC 158th Mediation Skills Accreditation and Certification Training

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